By: Jennifer McMillen Smith, MSSA, LISW-S, Division of Infectious Disease and medically reviewed by Ann Avery, Infectious Disease Physician at Metrohealth Medical Center

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If the last year has proven anything, we need touch.😜😩😏 Many of us want to touch other people and want them to touch us. I hope over the last year, you’ve touched yourself plenty! 😘 Masturbation is a totally fun way to get to know yourself and what you like. Because we alllllllll need a little (or a lot, hehe 😉) of that, too. If you’re fortunate enough to be able to touch another person and you both have consented, I hope you’ve had some time to give each other deep-tissue, oiled up action! 😏

In this case, I’m totally referring to massages. Now, if they lead to other deep-tissue action, I recommend water-based action. But I digress.

Feel free to stop and go rub one out right now, on you or your partner, hehe!

If you’re already getting your fill of massages, I salute. If you aren’t indulging in these massages, I lovingly encourage you start ASAP! I’m a big fan of erotic massages, so here are some tips to get started:

First and foremost, talk to your partner about how they want to be touched. Be sure not to assume. That simple conversation can create the map toward destination: Pleasure! 😍

Set the mood. Choose a place in the house where you have privacy and space. You want the room to literally stretch out. Plan ahead to know if you need to put down a towel or sheet. Figure out the temperature in that room. As you start taking off clothing, you don’t want to be shivering. Make sure the room is comfortable for both of you. Think about lighting too. Overhead light can spoil the sexy time. Candles and salt lamps bring a sexy vibe. Choose wisely 😉.

Don’t start touching anyone with cold hands. Love and passion aren’t enough for that foolishness. It’s shocking to the skin and it can really kill the mood. You can run your hands under warm water for a few minutes or use actual handwarmers. If you want to keep it simple, I recommend the good Birdman handrub (trust me on this one).

Next, include allll the body oils, y’all! Body butters and lotions are good too. First things first, take off your clothes if you’re using oil. You don’t have to be totally naked but less mess, less stress. Using oils and lotions promote skincare AND allows for the hands to go smoothly over your partner’s body. Warming up your hands can also unlock the properties in your body and massage oils. The options are endless.

Don’t hold yourself back from a good time. Lotions and oils reduce friction. The rough riding doesn’t have to start so soon.

With hands warmed and the oils assembled, start with a light touch. Take your time. Savor each stroke. This oil isn’t evaporating anytime soon.😏  Choose a part of your partner’s body and focus on that area. This can surely be a full-body experience, but ease into it. The shoulder and neck can be a good starting point.

Apply some pressure and see if it’s feeling good. Back to the communication: You need it. Everybody’s body is different, so make sure your partner is liking how and where you are touching them!

Don’t be shy in using more than your hands. You can kiss, lick, nibble, and everything else.

Let’s run down a few of the techniques that may work wonders:

• A Body-to-Body Massage (also known as “Nuru,” which translates to “slippery” 💦 in Japanese). Both you and your partner get naked and rub oil all over (of course, give each other a hand) then rub your bodies together. Try to be present for what that feels like.
• A penis massage can be one glorious hand job. 🍆The massage includes the shaft, balls, and the taint. Be gentle and use plenty of oil.
• A prostate or clitoral massage definitely pleases. There are never enough times to get it right and perfect your technique.

Take turns giving each other massages. Massages don’t have to lead to sex, but if they do, by all means … get some! 😉 🍆 💦👅 Massages could be done in several rounds. You go then he goes, then back to you and then him. Do what feels good in the moment and just have fun! Now, go grab your sexy partner and try some of these massage techniques out!