Born and raised in Memphis, Tennessee, Sharmain was diagnosed with HIV at just four months old. Her journey has been one of overcoming challenges; and managing stigma, family dynamics, and personal relationships.
Early life and diagnosis
“I remember feeling different, but not understanding why. The frequent hospital visits were just a part of life.”
With her diagnosis coming at such a young age, Sharmain’s early years were marked by many visits to hospitals. Her first appointments were at Le Bonheur Children’s Hospital, and as she got older, she received care at St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. Despite her health challenges, Sharmain excelled academically, graduating from high school in 2008 and earning a bachelor's degree in psychology in 2013.
Facing stigma and family dynamics
Growing up with HIV, Sharmain faced stigma, both from friends and family. She recalls, "My friend's mother would make me eat off paper plates and bleach any real plates I used." Her family often treated her differently and discouraged her from talking about her condition. "I felt like an outcast in my home," Sharmain shared. She didn’t feel understood or supported. The stigma wasn’t just external; it seeped into her self-perception, making it tough to develop good self-worth.
Overcoming adversity
Despite these challenges, Sharmain hasn’t been knocked off course. She is married and has five amazing kids! Her husband accepted her condition without hesitation. "When I told him I had HIV, he didn't flinch. He said, 'Okay, so what do we do now?'"
Sharmain's openness about her HIV status was an important part of her dating life, and she found a supportive partner who accepted her. "It was liberating to find someone who saw me for who I am, beyond my diagnosis."
Advocacy and empowerment
After a betrayal by a close friend who disclosed her HIV status to others, Sharmain chose to become an advocate. "I realized that by telling my own story, I could reclaim my power and help others facing similar challenges.”
Her advocacy journey began, and she has since become a powerful voice for those living with HIV. Sharmain speaks at events, participates in community outreach programs, and raises awareness through social media. "Sharing my story publicly was scary at first, but the positive feedback and the connections I made gave me the strength to continue.”
Parenting and transparency
As a mother, Sharmain is transparent with her children about her HIV status. She believes in honest and open communication, explaining things in age-friendly ways. "I want my kids to know the truth so they can be informed and not afraid.” She encourages them to ask questions, too. "Knowledge is power. I want my kids to grow up without the fears and misconceptions that I faced.”
Health and milestones
Sharmain's health has been stable, with her HIV status being undetectable for years. Her children do not have HIV, which is evidence of the medical advances in treating HIV. She delivered all her children and breastfed three of them. "These milestones are important to me. They show I can live a normal life and achieve my dreams.”
Her journey through motherhood and advocating for others showcases her resilience. "Every doctor's visit, every milestone my children reach, reminds me of how far we've come.”
Advice for others
To young people born with HIV, Sharmain advises self-acceptance and viewing their condition as a unique aspect of their identity. "Your HIV status doesn't define you. It's just a part of who you are, and you can use it to inspire others.”
For those recently diagnosed, she encourages them to seek support and stay in touch with all the progress in HIV medicine. "You are not alone. There is a community out there ready to support you.” She urges those living with HIV to seek counseling and support groups. "Taking care of your mental health is just as important as managing your physical health.”
Positive Peers App
Sharmain is actively involved in the Positive Peers app, designed to provide 24/7 support for young people with HIV. As the new app admin for Tennessee, she appreciates the app's safety features and how it connects people based on age and location.
"Positive Peers has been a game-changer for me. It offers a safe space to share experiences and get support… the community on Positive Peers is like a family. We support each other through the ups and downs.”
An inspiring road ahead
Sharmain's journey is one of personal growth and advocacy. Her experiences have brought her strength. She educates others and supports those living with HIV. She’s a proud mom. Her life is a testament to the power of resilience and the impact of community support. Having HIV does not limit one's ability to lead a fulfilling and impactful life.